


To Forget

by buttfulmavinness



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Grieving, Inspired by Saint James' Infirmary, Intoxication, M/M, Set around 50's to 60's, vampire!AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-25
Updated: 2015-07-25
Packaged: 2018-04-11 05:19:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4422884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buttfulmavinness/pseuds/buttfulmavinness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I went down… To Saint James’ Infirmary.” The man’s voice is cracking and thick from booze, words slurring together.<br/>‘If there was one way to perform this song, it’d be exactly like this’, Hide decides. ‘Drunk out of your mind and so broken hearted you might break down crying any second.’</p>
<p>Death plagues the city, taking anyone and everyone without discrimination. Forgetting the dead is easier with a bottle in hand and a stranger latched to your side.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Forget

**Author's Note:**

> *coughs* what. i'm clogging the tags? oh. sorry.  
> To catch the right feeling, you can listen to Hugh Laurie's cover of St James' Infirmary, which you can find both in Spotify (https://open.spotify.com/track/4eAlHTYUZvllH2dE2juVQZ) and Youtube (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tm-9t-ZF2s).

The stuffy bar is far from lively, and Hide prefers it that way. The band is taking a rest, and the only sounds left are the coughs of smokers, clinks of glasses and the screeching of a chair when man in a crinkled, fancy suit gets up from his seat. Hide watches him sway and stumble his way to the bass player, pointing at the general direction of the piano. The band member seems slightly amused, nodding to him and calling out to his friends.

Hide puts down his drink, turning towards the beginning show. The drunk man plops ungracefully on the seat, accidentally slamming a few keys when he tries to get support from the piano to keep himself from falling over. A few startled shouts are thrown from the back, and many eyes turn to him. He doesn’t show any sign of noticing them and stares at the keys under his fingers, trying a few out. When he’s satisfied, he turns his unfocused gaze to the band and nods.

Hide listens to the lazy notes ring out, a few of them missing or incorrect but only adding to the melancholy that suddenly surrounds the whole bar. The cello joins in, quiet in the background. The playing man gains strength, pounding the keys, and the band joins in whole. The aggressive style doesn’t last for long. The piano mellows back to it’s original sound, and some of the instruments back down.The mouth organ wails along with the piano.

They all become silent for a few seconds. Then the bass begins a steady low tune and one by one they join in again.

The drunk man is no longer as emotional about his play, rather letting himself be swept by the music. It is right before the man begins singing that Hide recognises the song.

“ _I went down… To Saint James’ Infirmary._ ” The man’s voice is cracking and thick from booze, words slurring together.

‘If there was one way to perform this song, it’d be exactly like this’, Hide decides. ‘Drunk out of your mind and so broken hearted you might break down crying any second.’

“ _Saw my baby there_ ,” and as if on cue, a tear slides down the pianist’s face. “ _She was stretched out on a long white table… So cold, so sweet, so sweet, so fair_.”

The words remind him of the young boy he met last week. It had been a shame he wasn’t able to keep him alive.

“ _Let her go, let her go, God bless her…_ ” The drunk man raises his hand up, shaking it in ecstasy that reminds Hide of those religious to their very bones. ” _Wherever she may be!_ ”

‘Not in Heaven at least. But not in Hell either. No sir, that’s right here.’

“ _She can search this whole wide world over._ ” His lip wobbles dramatically as he sings.

“ _She won't ever find another man like me_ ,” the last words are mangled by his sobbing. Hide muses over seducing the man. He’s weak in mind, heart and body; the perfect prey. He’s sure his face is pretty under all the tears, the eyebags and the puffed face. That’s always an added bonus.

“ _When I die, bury me in straight laced shoes… A box backed suit and a Stetson hat_.”

Hide hopes to all that is good and right in the world, not that there is much, that he isn’t actually thinking of that being his funeral attire. By the way he’s pounding the keys with new eagerness, he seems to be taking the song very seriously. ‘Perfect right to the T.’

“ _Put a 20 dollar gold piece on my watch chain; So the boys'll know I died standin' pat_.”

As the song ends its last verse, the man loses his passion. Hide can see how his shoulders slump, how his fingers no longer hold the strength to push them properly down. He looks pitiable. When the last note dies out, he moves out of the piano chair, making his way back to the bar counter. There is no applause, just a collective heavy cloud of misery they all share.

“Whiskey. Straight,” the pianist croaks. The bartender looks conflicted but complies. Hide takes the opportunity to slide next to him, calling out: “Same for me. I’ll pay.”

The drunk is too intoxicated to even be baffled by it, downing his drink in one go once it’s in his hand. Hide sits down on the stool next to him.

“That was quite the performance you gave.” He flashes a smile when he finally gains the attention he’s sought.

“Thank… you… I’m sorry, you are?”

Hide extends his hand.

“Hide.”

The man looks at it, staring for a few seconds until reaching to grab it.

“Shuu…”

Hide holds onto it, caressing his thumb over Shuu’s knuckles.

“Why such a depressing song, Shuu?”

He looks like he wants to pull his hand away, but he doesn’t. Hide lowers their hands but keeps caressing, slow, comforting movements over Shuu’s skin, hidden from any curious gazes. Shuu swallows.

“I…” he loses his thoughts, but gathers them quickly. A dark shadow hangs over his face. “I lost someone.”

“Oh?” Hide leans closer, cocking his head to the side. “Who?”

“My lover.”

Hide joins his other hand to touch the delicate and soft skin.

“You broke up?”

“No,” Shuu’s voice turns gravelly, “Died. Of that cursed plague.”

Hide hums in recognition. It’s no longer a surprise to find someone dead in the streets. Everyone has lost someone by now to the plague. Bodies litter the snow piles in the mornings, and what’s left of their blood colours the ground dark red.

“Would you…” Shuu begins, softly. He hesitates to continue, but he squeezes Hide’s hand and asks pleadingly: “Would you help me forget?”

Hide looks at their hands and turns his gaze back to Shuu. He releases one hand to slide his yet untouched drink towards the pianist.

“Of course.”

Shuu sighs in relief and takes the drink with a thankful nod. Hide watches him down it, watches him down the second and the third until he cuts him off. He doesn’t want Shuu to throw up on him.

They leave the bar, Hide helping Shuu up by his arm around his waist and Shuu’s arm over his shoulder. Their steps are stumbly, but the cold air clears Shuu’s mind a bit. In the snow’s light he pushes Hide into a closed off alleyway, lips hungrily searching for his mouth. Hide tugs on the back of Shuu’s head, messing his hair with his fingers, pushing his body closer.

Shuu’s warm. His chest, his lips and his hands are warm against Hide’s body. He thinks about feeding. He has no real need to, he just fed last week. But the way Shuu licks at Hide’s lips with his hands trailing down his waist, Hide thinks he can give himself a treat.

He pulls away for a second, confusing Shuu, but he calms him down by shushing against his skin.

“Shh, it’s okay. Everything’s fine. I’ll make you forget.” He trails kisses down Shuu’s lips to his jaw and down his jugular. “I’ll make you forget everything.”

He licks at his fangs, as they grow out, mouthing along Shuu’s throat. Once they’re poking his lips, he opens his mouth wide and pierces through the slick skin.

Shuu tenses up but is too drunk to try and get away. He twitches occasionally, a delicious whine breaking through his breathing as Hide sucks on his blood.

Hide’s not hungry and it’s easy, well, as easy as it gets, to stop well in time. He pulls back, licking the trickle of blood off of Shuu’s skin.

“Y-you…”

“Mm… Don’t worry, I fed last week on this beautiful young boy."

Shuu twitches, but Hide keeps him close, not allowing him to get away just yet. The memories from his last meal fill his mind and wistfully recounts it to Shuu:

"He was so tasty, that I accidentally killed him. It was such a shame, I just had to place him somewhere good, so I took him to the steps of the church, Even found him a few winter roses.”

Shuu drops on his knees, still being held close to Hide’s body by Hide’s hands.

“Do you feel dizzy?” Hide inquires from him. Shuu’s head sways from side to side.

“You killed him. You took my Kaneki away.”

Hide purses his lips. “Oh.”

He plays with a strand of Shuu’s hair. It’s soft and looks lighter against the snowy ground than it did inside the bar. ‘Pretty.’

“Sorry. I was hungry.”

Shuu’s head hangs down as he stares at the ground, not seeing anything through his tears. A weak sob jerks his body, and Hide holds him closer. ‘He must be lonely.’

“Take me… Take me to him. If I cannot be with him in life, I want to join him in death,” Shuu begs, clutching onto Hide’s midsection. Hide pets his hair, shushing him again.

“Shuu, oh Shuu. Killing you would be a downright waste.” He kneels down before him, taking Shuu’s face between his hands. Tears are running freely down his cheeks and Shuu looks at him with glassy eyes.

“Without him, life has no meaning to me.”

Hide smiles gently, allowing his fangs to pierce through his lip. A small drop of blood forms out and he swipes it with his tongue. Shuu doesn’t stop him from leaning in and kissing him gently. Hide’s tongue tastes his own blood as he pushes through Shuu’s wet lips. He rubs his tongue along the slick and unmoving tongue, over and over. When he pulls back he pecks him on the lips one more time.

“I told you I would make you forget. And now I have ‘til the end of time to make it come true.” Shuu’s eyes widen, fear and tears mixing in them. Hide leans against his chest, holding onto his waist. “I have been alone for so long. Now we both have someone to ease our loneliness.”

 

The first rays of sun are piercing through the curtains, lighting up the man huddling beside the wall. Hide walks over to him, steps light and slow.

“What are you brooding away in the corner for?” Hide asks as he drapes his arms around Shuu’s shoulders. Shuu turns his head away from him. Hide sighs. “You’re still mad over what happened who knows how many years ago?”

Over half a century and he still hasn't forgiven Hide. He'd be lying if it doesn't excite him just a little bit. One day, Shuu will look at him in the eye again. Hide knows the day isn't far away.

Shuu grumbles under his breath, making him grin. He leans towards Shuu’s ear, his breath ghosting over his skin, raising goosebumps.

“You know. I have an idea… Something you’ll definitely like…” He trails his tongue over the shell of Shuu’s ear, feeling him grow rigid under his arms. ‘He’s so into it.’

“I will always,” he whispers, “ _always_ , help you…” His arms slide down Shuu’s shoulder to his chest. “...to forget.”

**Author's Note:**

> Aaaah, this was a fun one night writing project. This was inspired by the mentioned song as well as jackykisaragi’s ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS vampire!Hide art:  
> http://jackykisaragi.tumblr.com/post/123368182922/more-vamp-hide-and-tsuki-hide-3-au-human  
> http://jackykisaragi.tumblr.com/post/123280197937/au-vampire-hide  
> Tell me what you think! Criticism? Nitpicking? Comma fuckers in the audience? (My favourite people<3) No? Please point out any and all mistakes you find, as I still don’t have a beta. And thank you for reading!  
> Writing tumblr: prettywordsforprettybirds  
> Personal tumblr: buttfultsukineki


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